The epitome of getting your dreams crushed.

[december_solstice]

Well sort of.

Can you believe there was a time when you could actually WORK your way through college? Now, students are spending the cost of a house in less than 4 years.

College is an investment. One that isn't easy to make if you're poor.

The worst is that overwhelming excitement you feel after finding out you got in -- then realizing you can't even afford the tuition deposit, or any other fee thrown at you that is required to even register for your classes.

My spirit? Crushed. My dreams? In ruins.

Yeah, I'll get over it, sure, eventually I will move along and carve a new path for myself.

But there is something else I've realized. It's all nonsensical. Higher education is a profitable business -- it does NOT have the student's best interest in mind.

Here is my story:

I recently completed my Bachelor's and graduated with a 3.5 GPA. This Spring, I applied for an MFA program, with the same university, and got in! This summer, I took my final 2 credits I needed to graduate and start my MFA program in the Fall.

By the time I was nearly done with my short 7 week summer course, I discovered that I would not qualify for any financial aid. For me to qualify, I would need to take 6 credits or more. Why would I take 6 credits, when I only need 2 to graduate? Why would I waste upwards 10,000 in federal grants, scholarships and student loans, that I simply do not need to spend? Why on earth would I do that? That funding could be applied to another deserving student.

This problem has only presented itself because I wanted to graduate this summer, instead of in the Fall. It was the most logical solution to complete my final credit in the summer, therefore being able to attend graduate school in the Fall. Logical. Common sense, even.

In order to start the MFA program, I needed to first fork out nearly $1500 in a matter of days. They did not offer me a payment plan even when I tried to explain to them-- Hey man, there isn't $1500 lying around under my mattress. Hey man, I'm living in it (rent). Which I can barely pay. I'm just trying to get ahead here. I am a working young person with little to no credit. I can't get a private student loan when I have no cosigner. Nor could I get a personal loan.

When I finally exhausted all of my options, I surrendered to the fate...that I kind of already saw coming.

That wasn't even the nail in the coffin, though.

Can I take a semester off to pay this off?

Admissions requires $500 for a 12 month deferment. BY MONDAY. Let me just go pick money from my money tree out back. Not only do I have to wait an entire school year, but I need to pay a tuition deposit for the f'ing tuition I am not even f'ing paying.

So tell me, does colleges have the student's best interest in mind? Because, excuse my french but, all I smell coming out of this university is bullshit.

Comments

[ringlat.livejournal.com]

My wife's mom has dangerously high blood pressure, and she is fat/obese with depression and tons of health problems (some from birth, some not), but she also constantly eats things like white-flour bread, potato chips (that have sugar in them), pizza etc. She basically doesn't eat vegetables aside from potatoes, never eats fruit, she refuses to try stuff like the pasta we eat (made from corn or whole-wheat flour) instead of white-flour pasta. She claims white flour "tastes the best" and she thinks that we've stopped eating it because we don't like the taste, no matter how many times we tell her it's for our health. On that note, there's not many chips you can buy without sugar, but I eat chips made out of different vegetables (beets, carrots, potatoes, parsnips) for example and if I weren't so lazy I'd try making my own at home (I have an awesome french fry recipe btw).

She is REALLY REALLY mean all the time, but especially in the mornings, gets huge cravings for chips/sugary stuff basically every day (especially in the evenings), and then she's really tired basically anytime after three in the afternoon. She has sleeping problems and also takes at least one nap a day (btw white flour/sugar affects sleep too, depending on the person). The doctor told her over a year ago that her blood pressure is so high that even just a headache could be the sign of a stroke or heart attack, and she's already had two strokes in her life apparently. Despite this she skips taking her blood pressure medicine, doesn't exercise, refuses to change her diet, lies to doctors and/or simply doesn't go to the doctor when she needs to. Then she talks about "thank god I never started smoking!" as if smoking is any worse, and she claims that being fat is "just in the family".

Being fat isn't in the family. Eating habits and exercise habits, things you teach your children, DO run in the family. Her mom is diabetic, still eats candy every day, is heavily depressed and never exercises past the little she needs to for daily life.

My wife's cousin, who's only 25 years old, recently had a brain cancer surgery. Why'd she get brain cancer? She constantly drinks aspartame-filled soda, she won't listen to anyone telling her that it's poison, and literally the first thing she asked for after she woke up from the tumour surgery was for a diet (aspartame) soda : l

I mean, part of me thinks "fine, let them suffer and die if they're going to be like that". But I know it's only all about education in the long run. If you learn from a young age how to not be so stubborn and to re-examine things based on new evidence... If they only imposed a big tax on all items with added sugar (just like tobacco has a big tax), and then sent that tax money towards making dentists cheaper...

[outerspace-bae.livejournal.com]

I feel you. My parents are going down that same road. My mom, who is barely breaking 50 is having all these health problems, and I'm worried. On top of that, she also skips her high blood pressure medication! I tell her -- little at a time, one step at a time. Start by simply bringing fruits for snacking on, you know what I mean? Slow and steady. So you don't notice it.

My dad, recently had a bad accident. Then surgeries. He fell out of a tree for god's sake! He hurt his back and broke his leg. (He's a landscaper.) Now my mom has to take care of him and herself, and I'm a little panicky about it. The reason why I'm feeling nervous about their situation is because, like you mentioned, diet greatly effects the healing process and I am worried that his diet isn't very good, and he won't heal properly or promptly.

I've been heavy my entire life, well, since probably age 8 or so LOL so my whole life LOL

When I left the nest, I started making lifestyle changes. Because of my weight, also with hereditary reproductive issues (my mom's uterus collapsed after she had me and she stillborn-ed twice), I haven't been ovulating for...years. In short, I'm infertile. Hence my ovulation posts. Studies have shown that changes in weight can give your lady parts a little kick, so I started doing yoga and lost some weight. I ovulated. Once.

This has been difficult on me, and I try not to be resentful towards my parents for not taking me to a doctor as a kid. My father WAS quite a conservative, so I took birth control without him knowing. He was also quite bigoted and ignorant at the time, and didn't think I needed to go to an OBGYN because "that's where girls go to get BC because they had sex blah blah", so now I'm suffering from his stupidity. My chances of having kids naturally decreases greatly in my 30's. I got about 5 years to get my body to do what it' suppose to so I can have spawn.

Otherwise, I actually have incredibly good health! I know that you mentioned that Americans often eat out. That's true. My diet is SO much better today simply because I cook my meals. I actually really enjoy it. I take pride is feeding my husband wholesome foods, and building healthy habits -- habits I will NEED if I want to have a family one day. I don't understand why people even eat out. It's expensive. You can make the same thing at home that is either the same or better. Too tired? Lazy? Probably. Keep in mind Americans also work a lot. People working 2-3 jobs, especially young people, is very common. Americans work a lot. They get home after an 8 hour shift, sit on the couch, stuff their face while watching American Idol Lol

I can tell you right now that New Yorkers eat A SHIT TON OF TAKE OUT. I did when we first moved here. I loved it (still do). But, I realize this isn't something I can do more than 2-3 times a month. But the average New Yorker probably orders take out every day. Yes, every day.

I realize food access is a big factor in all of this, and I am particularly lucky in that retrospect. Here, we have farmers markets and fruit/vegetable stands everywhere. Very affordable. Everything is accessible. I mean it's New York. Everything you can think of is down the block. If you live in butt-fuck Alabama or bible-belt Mississippi (where my bffs live) -- forget about it. There isn't even a culture or interest in that part of the states for health food.

i'm always going off-topic

[ringlat.livejournal.com]

My grandparents have been on a similar "no sugar, no white flour" diet as me for about five years now (they take it a step further and don't eat things like potatoes either) and apparently they feel healthier than they've felt in decades - but everyone around them just scoffs at it. My dad eats fairly healthy, and I'd say very healthy compared to most Americans, but he too hasn't exactly tried that kind of diet.

Yeah, a few years ago someone I knew had basically the same surgery as me. Except he didn't even quit smoking before he had the surgery - claiming he didn't have to. Then he actually had to spend 2-3 weeks in the hospital afterwards because he was healing so slowly. I left the hospital in two DAYS.

Ahh. My wife's cousin actually recently got some kind of weird problems from taking birth control that are probably going to stay with her for life. Now she suddenly can't eat certain foods, I don't remember what happened. As for me, I would never have kids (with my own genes) halfway just because any kid would have a high chance of having eyesight as bad as or worse than mine. Either way I'd rather just adopt and spare some kid an abusive home or orphanage lol.

As for parents... well, nowadays I don't talk to anyone in my family, they more or less disowned me when I moved abroad and got married. But a few years ago my dad told me that everyone in the family thinks I'm really weird and that I have something wrong in my head, and that they've thought so for a long time. And I was like, if you thought that, why did none of you ever take me to get psychological testing? (BTW I have taken it and I'm perfectly normal except for that I have slightly above-average intelligence and adaptation skills, and that I like to fantasize. Pretty sure fantasizing is a skill I taught myself through fandom).

And also, no one in my family really treated me differently despite that I'm almost blind. Sometimes this is perfectly fine, but a lot of the time it's unfair. My pupils don't contract and don't change in light, yet I never had prescription sunglasses (just like, clip-on sunglasses that are awful and super heavy). I never had any kind of reading help (no magnifying glasses, no large-print books - which btw I didn't even know existed until like five years ago). My dad would expect me to find things in two seconds despite that when you have ex. a pile of clothes, my eyes can't distinguish the separate pieces so well. And since I was TAUGHT to not use any help like that, I became someone who doesn't get help even when I really need it, and I probably missed out on a lot of stuff (if it were easier to read I would read more books).

Like I want to do arts and crafts, but every time I try I realize the reason why I get so frustrated is because I can't see shit, or I try to read a book and realize I never read books (that aren't on the computer) anymore because it's so difficult, so I really need some kind of magnifying glass thingy : / I do want to go out and be active but I feel like shit when I realize I can't do some stuff. Like, someone even just shows you a photo on their smartphone or your potential employer points to a paper and you smile and go "mmhm" and pretend you can see it....