Happy Monday

I was a lot more productive this weekend than I expected to be! For the most part, I just did a lot of housework. I cleaned the living-room and cleaned/mopped all the floors in the ENTIRE apartment. I also did more laundry in the tub. Did alright w/ grocery shopping. Sales aren't very good this week, but I made it work.

We've been eating quite a bit of breakfast foods - pancakes, bacon, and eggs mostly. I made that creamy mushroom chicken I mentioned and it turned out really good. I also made a lemon-y Spanish chicken w/ black beans which I also enjoyed. Baked cinnamon apples - simple and delicious. Very basic, simple, cheap stuff. Trying to keep the ingredients fresh, and overall eat fresh food.

In other news, I never went back to eat those lentils like I said I would before the weekend. They'll probably end up going to waste. Pretty sure they're spoiled, if not close to spoiled already. My dumb ass should have just thrown it in the freezer for later! On the bright side, I ate some of it, and it's not like lentils are much of an investment. It's not even worth $1.

I'm trying really hard to be conscious about my wellness and self care. 7 cups has been interesting, however, I haven't actually tried the online therapy yet. I'm kind of scared! I know I could benefit, but I'm like...seriously nervous. I really gotta call my insurance. It's such a shame how much we waste our insurance. I mean, it's not that we waste it because we're on Medicaid - it's free - it's just the fact that, it's so costly just to go to appointments. There are transportation costs as well as co-pays. So you think - $20+?!...eh, I can wait it out longer! Sigh*

At the same time, it's a good feeling to know I've been eating and sleeping. A lot of sleeping actually. 10-12 hours per day. I've notice I do this every so often - sleep for very long hours (and still feel tired).

This morning I showered, shaved, put on deodorant and perfume, AND even a nude lip crayon and stud earrings! That may sound pretty standard, but that's HUGE for me. I usually never leave the house that "well done". Never. It's honestly been years since I cared about stuff like that. I got home and had wheat cereal. I notice my effort. It feels forced. But, I really am trying.

Tomorrow I actually have a phone interview for an "Assistant Director" position for a learning center in NJ. I have no idea how qualified I am for something like this, and tbh, I'm just testing the waters. I'm not really holding my breath. This employer has reached out to be more than once already, and shows serious interest in me. It's kind of far, but luckily for me, it's on a bus route that is fairly convenient. The bus station stops literally right in front of the center, and I can get on the bus just a few blocks from where I live. In short, it could be perfect. God, I might even pray about it. Maybe not. It would be funny if I'm offered this job though. It's a grown up job, for god's sake.

Amazon finally contacted me about restoring my Amazon and KDP account. Hopefully that means I can access my book very soon! I was directed to call them.

As for the next steps on my landlord situation, this is what I've been recommended by my lawyer, "your next step would be waiting for the notice of petition and petition, the actual ‘court papers’, and then going to court to put in your answer and speak to the other side face-to-face." I'm not quite sure when that will occur and when my court date will be, but I'm assuming it won't be this week.

Tomorrow I also plan to call Homebase. I think the best first step would be to simply call and discuss my specific situation and see what they say, especially since I'm kind of in a weird in-between dilemma right now. I'm not in housing court; yet, I'm dishing out legal issues. I'm not really in a situation where...I'm late on rent, I need help catching up - that's it. This is SO MUCH more complicated. I mean this is a total cluster fuck, you know?

As you can see. My main goal for this week is to make phone calls. The #1 thing I put off/avoid. But, I gotta push myself to do it, you know. Charge the phone. Call in the early mornings. Get it over with EARLY. Especially now when I have the minutes to do it. I don't always have my phone on.

I also realized that a lot of my anxiety and stress has to do with losing my cat. I'm going to be so fucked up if we have to leave without her. Ugh, I don't even want to THINK about that possibility. Jesus.

There is really so much I've been wanting to write down/share over the last 2-3 days. I wish I just wrote some of it down in my Writer app, even if I didn't intend to post it anytime soon. Honestly, blogging all of this on LJ is such a fantastic way to just...organize and reflect. It definitely helps me become more conscious about what's going on. Writing in a journal is so beneficial.

Development and Healing

I really want to work on my blog. I've neglected it for nearly a month. I've got to either pump out an article (grocery mini-haul/frugal meals), OR, reblog/share something. I have to do the same thing for my Facebook page as well as Twitter.

For wellness, I've actually notified how much Tumblr, and even ESO has been helping me heal. It really is all about how you spend your time. It's important to spend time doing things that give you joy, especially when you are depressed. But, it's also important to be conscious of the time spent, and not to spent ALL DAY doing one thing. Gotta have balance, basically. That's pretty standard advice.

On Tumblr, I've been basically creating a feed that is half nature/seasons and half writing/poetry. My feed is very calming. As for ESO, it's actually not too much about the game as it is about how I'm interacting with other people. I don't get a lot of human contact. In fact, I get almost none, especially when it comes to actually speaking to other people through a phone or mic. I've recently made friends on ESO, which I've been spending a good amount of time talking to in TS. I'm actually talking to other people and it's been very rewarding for someone like me who just doesn't talk to anyone. I've made a good chunk of friends on ESO, but a lot of them don't actually develop outside of the game. This is new to me, and I think very good for me.